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. By T.V. Antony Raj
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When I visited United States a year ago, I was shocked when I listened to some Americans blabber nonsense about India.
Then, I saw this video clip, a real eye opener, titled “Americans are NOT stupid” aired on CNNNN (Chaser NoN-stop News Network) with Julian Morrow interviewing normal, very stupid Americans, posing questions about the world. The answers are indeed very funny and hilarious.
Julian Francis Xavier Morrow (born 1975) is an Australian comedian and television producer from Sydney. He is best known for being a member of the satirical team The Chaser. He has appeared on several ABC Television programs including CNNNN.
Luckily for those like me who do not have the ‘ear’ to understand the American enunciation this version of the video clip is mercifully subtitled. However, I also prepared a transcript of the video so that you could read it at your leisure.
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Video Transcription
“Julian Morrow reporting: A lot of people give American a bum rap for being stupid and knowing nothing about the world, but the reality couldn’t be further from the truth. As I discovered on the street here, asking US locals about the very world their country runs.”
Julian Morrow: “Name a country that begins with U?”
“Yugaslavia?”
“Utah.”
“Utopia.”
Julian Morrow: “Who is in the coalition of the willing?”
“No freaking idea.”
“Afghanistan, Kuwait.”
“Iraq, Pakistan …”
Julian Morrow: “New Zealand.”
“New Zealand.”
Julian Morrow: “What’s the religion of Israel?”
“Israeli?”
“Muslim.”
“Islamic.”
“Catholic, probably.”
Julian Morrow: “What religion are buddist monks?”
“Budhist monks?”
Old woman: “????”
“Islamic? I don’t know.”
Julian Morrow: “Who won the Vietnam war?”
Young woman: “We did … Were we even in the Vietnam war!?”
Julian Morrow: “Who is Fidel Castro?”
“A singer?”
Julian Morrow: “How many sides does a triangle have?”
Man: “Damn, four.”
Young woman: “There’s no sides… One?”
Julian Morrow: “What is the currency in the United Kingdom?”
Old woman: “????”
Old woman: “What is the United Kingdom? I don’t know.”
Middleaged man: “Possibly American money.”
Old woman: “Queen Elisabeth’s money? That’s all I know.”
Julian Morrow: “”Name a country that begins with U?”
Teenage girl: “A country?”
Julian Morrow: “What about this one?”
Teenager: “”What”
Julian Morrow: “United States of America.”
Julian Morrow: “In terms of the war on terror, who do you think should be the
next country to invade?”
Middleaged woman: “Saudi Arabia.”
Middleaged man: “Somebody in the middle-east.”
Another middleaged man: “We make a big blast crater out of the ****ing
middle-east for all I care.”
Teenage boy: “I’m thinking … Italy.”
Julian Morrow: “Italy?”
Another Middleaged man: “Cuba.”
Julian Morrow: “Cuba?”
Another Middleaged man: “Yeah”
Teenage girl: “Iran.”
Julian Morrow: “Iran? Why’s that?
Teenage girl: “I think there’s a revolution going on pretty soon.”
Middleaged Afro-American: “Russia, China.”
Man: “India and Pakistan.”
Middleaged Afro-American: “Indonesia, Brazil.”
Middleaged man: “Korea.”
Julian Morrow: “Korea? Why do you say that?”
Middleaged man: “They’re trouble.”
Julian Morrow: “They’re trouble? Yeah? What’s troubling about them?”
Middleaged man: “Their attitude.”
Middleaged Afro-American: “Canada.”
Julian Morrow asks a woman to pin Sri Lanka on a map.
First woman: “Sri Lanka?”
Second woman pins correctly and says: “Right there.”
First woman: “Never heard of it.”
Julian Morrow approaches a couple.
Man: “Iran?”
Julian Morrow: “Put number one on Iran then.”
Man: ” South … south, south, south. Where are we.”
The man places the pin on Australia.
Another man: “North Korea.”
Julian Morrow: “North Korea? Why do you think North Korea?”
“Nuclear.”
Julian Morrow: “Nuclear?”
Another Afro-American: “Probably France.”
Julian Morrow: “Put a number 2 on France. Why do you say France?”
The man places number 2 on Australia. “It just seems to be some friction
between France and the United States.”
Julian Morrow: “Where do you think the best place to invade Iran would be
from? There would be from the north or south or the east or the west?”
Man: “The East.”
Woman: “West.”
Man pointing to Australia on the map says: “You know what it’s amazing
’cause I realized just now that North Korea is a lot larger than South Korea. I
didn’t know it was large like that!
Julian Morrow: “Kofi Anan is a drink, true or false?”
Man: “Coffee is a drink”
Another man: “Coffee in what?”
A woman: “It sounds like a law firm.”
Julian Morrow: “Who is Tony Blair?”
Man: “I don’t even know him.”
Julian Morrow: “Ok, alright. Any guess?”
Man: “Any guess … Skater?”
Another man: “Tony Blair is an actor.”
Another man: “Linda Blair’s brother?”
Julian Morrow: “Which countries are in the axis of evil?”
Young man: “Ehm, I know Germany is one of them, ehm, I’m not sure about
others.”
Another man: “Ok. California… New York.”
Woman: “Jerusalem.”
Another woman: “Jerusalem?”
Julian Morrow: “There’s more than one.”
Another woman: “I think all of them.”
Another man: “Florida.”
A jogger: “Ok. I’m a little bit mixed up over the Palestinians and the Israelis…
Which one is throwing the rocks?”
A woman: “The fella with the turban thing … I call it a diaper-head, really.”
Another man: “I believe … Mississipi.”
Julian Morrow: “Who was the first man on the moon?”
Man: “John Glen.”
Woman: “Armstrong walked on the moon but … I think it was a Russian, I’m not
sure.”
Another man: “Well, I can tell you some people don’t believe that happened,
they believe that it was reincarnated in Arizona somewhere.”
Julian Morrow: “What is a mosque?”
Woman: “Don’t have any idea.”
Julian Morrow: “Wanna guess?”
Woman: “An animal.”
Teenager: “I have no intelligent guess.”
Julian Morrow: “Ok, what about a stupid guess?”
…
Julian Morrow: “How may kidneys does a person have?”
Young man: “One.”
Julian Morrow: “What is collateral damage?”
Man: “Well, they just made a film about it, but that stuff I don’t know what it is.
It probably has something to do with what the movie was about. But not
necessarily related to the movie. Do you know what I mean?”
Julian Morrow: “How many World Wars have there been?”
Old man: “Three.”
Julian Morrow: “Which state does KFC come from?”
Jogger: “What the chicken? I don’t know. I really don’t know.”
Julian Morrow: “Ok, do you know what KFC stands for?”
Jogger: “Kentucky Fried Chicken, right?”
Julian Morrow: “Star Wars is based on a true story. True or false?”
Teenager: “True.”
Julian Morrow: “What are Hiroshima and Nagasaki famous for?”
Old man: “Judo-wrestling?”
Julian Morrow: “How many Eiffel Towers are there in Paris?”
Teenager: “I say, about ten.”
Julian Morrow: “What is Al-Queda?”
Young man: “Al-Queda is a group … a suicide group in Israel, in the Middle East, they do suicide bombs and stuff. And the president of it is Yasser Arafat … Everybody knows that.”
Very old man: “Al-Queda is a wing of the Masonic Order.”
Julian Morrow: “Where was the Berlin wall?”
No answer from young man.
Julian Morrow: “What is the main religion of Israel?”
Teenager: “I don’t know”
Young man: “Believe me, I don’t know the answer to this question, but I’m thinking … Israel?”
Julian Morrow: “The language they speak in Latin-America is Latin. True or false?”
Teenager: “The what?”
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RELATED ARTICLES
- Julian Morrow (en.wikipedia.org)
- Julian Morrow (walkie-talkie.com.au)
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Impressions 