Ways to Spot a Desi Who Has Just Returned from the USA


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Myself By T.V. Antony Raj

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An Indian returning at the airportGenerally, Asians who return to their homeland after a sojourn abroad become the cynosure of discussion among their envious folks. Their friends and relatives think that they purposely act funny to show off the habits they had picked up abroad.

By the way, I returned to India in January 2013 after a year-long holiday in the USA. In March 2007, long before I went to the USA, I came across some posts on the net with titles such as: “What happen when Desi Returns from USA” (sic), “21 Funny ways to spot a US returned Indian!” and many others, and had a good laugh.

Here are some ways to spot a Desi who has just returned from the USA:

1. Complains about “Jet Lag” even after two weeks.

2. Even after 4 months of arrival from abroad the stickers and labels of Airways are not removed from the luggage bags. Even for short visits roll out the cabin luggage bags, with Airways stickers still on them, on scraggy roads and uneven pavements.

3. Begins most conversations with “In US …” or “When I was in US …”

4. Complains about heat, dust, air pollution and excess humidity every time they step out of the house.

5. Uses deodorant sprays inside the house, and sprays deodorant perfumes on self and at times avoid bathing.

6. Wears ‘cargo’ pants and uses the pockets as temporary trash carriers and dumps the contents into real dustbins, if one is found at all. Toilet tissues also find their place in the pant pockets and in ladies’ handbags.

7. Complains about power-cuts and load shedding and praises the power service in the USA. In fact, complains about everything in India as if experiencing the inconveniences for the first time. If the power gets cut, instead of telephoning the Electricity Board, looks at other houses to verify that they too are experiencing the same inconvenience.

8. Wears seatbelt in cars and advises others to do so. Scorns the Indian roads. Automobiles are Audi, Mercedes, Lamborghini and not Maruti, Tata or Bajaj.

9. Says: “Excuse me” after sneezing.

10. Thanks waiters in restaurants.

11. Carries mineral water everywhere, and always speaks of ‘health’. Scrutinizes labels on milk products for the percentage of fat content. Prefers “Diet Coke” to normal Coke.13. Abhors eating or drinking tea in wayside hotels. Scorns Dhaba food while praising KFC or McDonald’s. Avoids eating hot chili stuff.

12. Tries to use a credit card or debit card in roadside hotels.

13. Distances are miles (not kilometers), weights are in pounds (not kilograms), and counts in millions (not in lakhs). Writes date as MM/DD/YYYY instead of DD/MM/YYYY.

14. Tries to figure all prices in dollars. They forget that when they were in the USA they mentally converted the price of each item they came across from dollars to rupees by multiplying roughly by 50.

15. Pronounces “schedule” as “skejule“, “module” as “Mojule”, and “Steak” as “Stake”.

16. Says:

“Hey” instead of “Hi”

“Yogurt” instead of “Curd”

“Cab” instead of “Taxi”

“Candy” instead of “Chocolate”

“Cookie” instead of “Biscuit”

“Free Way” instead of “Highway”

“Got To Go” instead of “Have To Go”

“Oh” instead of “Zero”. For 707, says “seven oh seven” instead of “seven zero seven”.

“X, Y, Zee” instead of “X, Y, Zed”

British and American English

I came across the above image in Facebook that might come in handy for those who aspire to travel to or work in the USA.

Keep smiling …

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Is the Real Doomsday Near?


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Myself . By T.V. Antony Raj

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MiddleEast-map-iran-iraq-israel

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Now that we have forgotten the uneventful December 21, 2012, can we be sure we are safe?

Today when we turn on the Television or radio, or read the newspapers, we see and hear only about Israel and Iran.

If Israel strikes Iranian nuclear sites, or Iran bombs, Israel, then what would happen? Would it not trigger the real doomsday for all of us living now on this Earth?

Iran sees Israel as its arch enemy, and it also considers Saudi Arabia as an enemy since it supplies its oil to the U.S. If Israel strikes Iran then the latter would retaliate by bombing Saudi oil fields.

I came across this video titled “The Day The World Ended” released by FutureMoneyTrends.com, a top trends research newsletter. This video simulates what could happen if Israel or Iran pulls the trigger.

In this simulation, the oil prices spike from $30 to $120 per barrel when the USA receives word that Israel has bombed Iran, and after an hour, the oil price soars up to $305, and by 9:30 AM, it rises to $450 per barrel forcing a systemic collapse of the world economy. Gold and silver become unavailable. Riots, civil unrest, force the governments to take drastic actions as a prelude to World War III.

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To watch Part 2 of this simulation video visit: http://FutureMoneyTrends.com/TheEnd

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December 21, 2012: Winter Solstice in the Northern Hemisphere or Is It Doomsday 2012?


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Myself . By T.V. Antony Raj

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solstices

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The astronomical event known as the solstice occurs when the Sun reaches its highest or lowest excursion point relative to the celestial equator on the celestial sphere. This event occurs twice a year.

On the day of the solstice, at local solar noon, the Sun appears to have reached its highest or lowest annual altitude in the sky above the horizon.

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UT date and time of equinoxes and solstices on the earth

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For any place other than the tropics the solstice day in summer is the longest day of the year, and the solstice day in winter is the shortest day of the year.

During the winter solstice in the Northern Hemisphere, also known as the Southern solstice that occurs on December 21st to 22nd, the Sun at noon would appear at its lowest altitude above the horizon, namely, at its southernmost point in the sky. On the other hand, in the Southern Hemisphere, the winter solstice also known as the Northern solstice occurs on June 20th to 21st each year.  On this day, the Sun appears at its northernmost point in the sky.

The axis of rotation of the earth directed towards the same point in the heavens is the result of its axial tilt and the gyroscopic influences of its daily rotation. As the Earth orbits around the Sun, the polar hemisphere facing the Sun encountering summer would after six months face away from the Sun to  endure the winter.

The solstices last only a moment in time. This year, winter solstice would occur today, December 21, 2012 at 11:12 AM UTC (6:12 AM EST; 4:42 PM IST).

Worldwide, interpretation of the winter solstice varies from culture to culture. However, all recognize the rebirth of the Earth that involves religious festivals, rituals, and other celebrations. The following lists a few observance believed to be directly linked to the winter solstice.

mayan-calendar-300x291

This brings us to the Doomsday Prophecy attributed by some to the Mayan Calendar. Though the Mayans never predicted that the world would end today, December 21, 2012, some doomsday soothsayers have been touting all these days that around 80 percent of the world population would be wiped out on this fateful day. Many who believe these scare mongers have left their homes; they have traveled to places where they think their chances of survival will be better.

Ten hours ago, I read an article titled “Global doomsday hot spots draw believers, revelers” by Vanessa Gera where she describes some of the world’s key doomsday destinations and other places marked by fear and fascination.

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December 21, 2012: Hello World, Did the Mayan Prophecy Happen?


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It is 30 minutes past noon December 20, 2012, here in Ellicott City, Maryland, USA.

In some parts of the world December 21, 2012 supposed to be THE fateful Doomsday has dawned.

A new day will begin in India in about 60 minutes from now.

Hello friends in India, are you still there? Yes?

What happened to the much peddled Mayan Prophecy?

By the way, today is a unique day: 20122012.

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I am moving back to India. For Good! Good Bye America. I Love You!


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Taraka Anil Sabbineni

By Taraka Anil Sabbineni

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DISCLAIMER: I know a huge campaign that’s floating around with all the news and stories about people moving back to India due to bad economy overseas or job cuts or pay cuts or what ever. I DO NOT AGREE with that. My facts do not agree with that. That is just one over-hyped bull shit I have ever heard in my life. India is not as shiny as it seems to be. My suggestion? Please DO NOT move back to India. You will repent your decision for the rest of your life. All Indians currently residing in North America or Europe, stay! 
http://www.happyschoolsblog.com/internanal-student-life-is-difficult-usa/

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I entered USA as a student and later after going through different stages and levels of visas, I came so close to getting a green card (as an immediate relative of a US citizen). I lived in USA for nearly 7 years and had a nice quality life before I decided to return back. But, I am not one of those who are easily falling for this India growth story.  What these company executives shown in presentations and the reality once you reach India is 180 degrees apart. India should get its act together and provide an ethical, corruption free environment for businesses to thrive. At the same time improve their college education to produce engineering graduates who have passion and creative mind for technology not just another body from some goofed university. Almost 2 years in a product design role I am optimistic that companies would be forced to bring technology jobs back to US or native locations if they wish to survive and grow in long-term. In some companies it is starting to happen as it is very difficult to hire quality technical people in India. The people who return back to India after having lived in USA for few years, at-least 90% of those return or try to return back to USA as the quality of life in America is a century ahead of India.

After having stayed in the US for nearly 7 years, I recently decided to shift base back to India. FOR EVER.

So … Why am I moving ?

I frankly have no clear idea. Because, The minute I graduated, my parents started galling me (and ate my brains out, while I am alive) to come back to India. Yeah, parents in India exercise a kind of weird control over their kids emotions. I never understood why the heck they want me do that because they usually never want me do anything that I do not want to do, … long story short … but finally now, I gave up. Now that I ‘ve made the decision and now I am like “ What the heck, let’s do it “. (do not attempt to do it at home) .

  • Are they missing me ? Oh ! Come on, its been 7 years and they can always come and live with me, here.

  • Is there a huge family business/obligations that needs someone to look after ?? Nope, my dad is an employee, with assets that can easily be liquidated. (Also, I am against family run businesses)

I just did not understand. But, as I said I just gave up ! But, I am particularly thinking (worried) about all those stupid people who thinks ‘any Indian who came back for good must be the one who cannot find/keep a job overseas.’

Where are you going ?

Bengaluru. They say it is the silicon valley of India, which again is bullshit. Yes it is silicon valley of India only if the real Silicon Valley in California is all about a bunch of cheap-labour outsourcing, software companies. The Silicon Valley is about people and their ideas, innovation, the environment that nourishes the ideas. It is not just a name. If you remove all of that from the silicon valley and throw in a bunch of egoistic bitchy bossy bosses and the worst maniacs of all venture capitalists, and most unprofessional cheap-ass software engineers who smell ‘desi’ in their attitude, what you get is the shittiest silicon valley knock off on earth.

A place where I can not shop in the middle of the night (Think 24 x 7 Meijer), where nosy people live, where even Subway sells stale products (Eat Fresh !), where objectivity is nowhere to be found, yucks ! (yeah, yeah, you are gonna say, “Aren’t you born in India ? Don’t just be an ass**** !” . What Ever dude !)

Do What ?

First of all, I am going to stink. And then bitch about being home. (Yeahh, I am an ass-****). And then whine about missing a better ‘life’. Some how this whole news was leaked before I announce it officially (Its official with this blog post) and a while ago I got a call from one of the investors at a Bangalore based start-up, whom I knew personally. He formally introduced me to the founders and other investors. Actually I really am surprised by the level of enthusiasm and goals they have. Then, it occurred to me, moving back is not so depressing after all. So, I would be joining them focusing on their Mobile Enterprise Solutions Platform. I also will be learning professional photography from Arvind Bhatt/AK Nathan. And Of Course, as always, I will be travelling around the world restarting with ********* (Hint: Sunburnt Country)”, this summer.

So, When ?

I gave my 15 day notice but my employer told me that I probably am going to stay for 15 more days later on. Then I am going to do a vacation and then that will be it ! So It is going to be about 45 days from today ! Yes, there is going to be a garage sale ! A really huge one ! Contact me !

So, Finally …

Now, you might be thinking, Anil is the biggest stereo-typed dick I ‘ve ever seen. Why is he fucking whining so much ? Yep ! Probably. Though I didn’t live my whole life in Detroit and here in San Francisco, I spent most of my best years there. People always said that School years and Single years would be some of the most fun years of life, and my school years here truly did not disappoint. (Of Course, the other half of them are in India and I loved them as much). I loved those early mornings when I’d go to Starbucks and pick up a grande vanilla latte, and sometimes that delicious 20-grams-of-fat brownie, and head over to school or all those parties in Detroit. (Yep, Detroit is where I spent most of my fun years)

So, I am gonna miss all the amazing people I met here and all that I can learn while am here. I think, in India, one can enjoy is just quasi-freedom, the one every one else approved that others to have ! Sucks ! I just do not know any one back there any more !

The attitudes like ‘chalta hai’ and ‘bossism’  in India is one commonality and I have to realize this, so that I truly can come to peace with living in India. One of my mom’s friends once told me “to survive in India you need two things: patience and a good sense of humor.” So, when I think of India as a vibrant place and that India too has so much to offer because it’s modernizing in many ways, it is not that depressing after-all !

Now, if any one of you still make that decision and decide to move back, I am adding some tips along with a precautionary one line advise “ THINK AGAIN “. Now that you have re-thought again and made your decision, Read on. Some tips might help you. Good Luck on your future endeavours.

  1. One important thing that you must understand very well: How much you get paid ? When it comes to compensation, people moving back have inflated expectations. Do not go by hearsay; a friend or friend’s friend who returned to India has told you a tall story about Indian salaries. Do not go by that yard stick. USD will not convert to INR. The first thing to remember is that you will not make the rupee equivalent of your US salary in India. The cost of living in India is significantly lower than that in the US. This also means a lower labour cost in India. And pay in India does not usually reflect cost of living. You make less than you should (Big Mac Index).Now according to the last available index dated July 2011, a Big Mac costing USD 4.07 in the US costs USD 1.89 in dollar terms in India (Rs 85 converted at an exchange rate of Rs 45). It means that the Big Mac costs 54% less in India; the cost of living is 54% lower in India. Read another way, this means that the rupee is undervalued by 54% to the dollar and that on the basis of PPP, one dollar would actually be worth Rs 21 instead of Rs 45. So if you are drawing a salary of USD 100,000 in the US, you can expect to draw Rs 21 lakh in India, give or take. At an exchange rate of Rs 45, that would translate to an Indian salary of USD 46,666 or 46% of the US salary.

  2. Jot down YOUR pro’s and con’s. I am listing a few that crossed my mind here.

  • Pros of moving to India:

  • Can be great career move and an opportunity to try new things at a lower cost – India is just a different ball game and even I am hyper excited about start-ups and the market here.

  • Certain luxuries are very affordable – personal trainer daily, photography workshops, getting a home theater setup.

  • Travel more in and around India – amazing places are 2-3hr flight away – Sri Lanka to Dubai to Macau and rest of Asia.

  • Cons of moving to India from US: I will make this short

  • India is expensive if you want to live like an American. On the other hand money can get most things done for you easily.

  • Lousy Vacations. Creepy, nosy People.

  • Lack of parks, good hiking trails and things for kids to do on weekends.

  • Attention to detail and reliability is missing in work and people here.

  • Pollution (not so bad in Bangalore), noise, traffic and general dirtiness.

  • Bureaucracy – knowing people who know people. US is more straightforward in how we deal with people and things.

  • Being nice is not the way to go and is generally underrated – you need to toughen up or else people will take advantage of you, you will not get things done.
  • Easy availability of everything is missing – HDMI cable to cookie dough to latest iPhone. You can get a lot in India these days but still it is nothing like walking into Frys or Costco or Trader Joes in the US. Same goes for internet reliability and bandwidth – so if you are someone who thrives on being on the cutting edge of tech. it can be issue at times.

Reproduced from Anilyzed (Published on March 25, 2012)

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