Category Archives: Humour

A Thanks Giving Day story: The Letter Addressed to God.



By T.V. Antony Raj


A still from the film "Slumdog Millionaire"
A still from the film “Slumdog Millionaire”


A few days ago, during the incessant rain and floods in Chennai, Tamilnadu, India, a little boy wanted 100 rupees to buy food for his family who had not eaten for two days. He prayed to God. When nothing happened and no one officially came to help them, he decided to write a request letter to God.

A puzzled post office staff on seeing the letter addressed to God forwarded it to the Chief Minister.

The amused Chief Minister thought that 100 rupees would be a lot of money for a little boy to buy food. So, she instructed her secretary to send the little boy 30 rupees instead from the Chief Minister’s relief fund.

When the little boy received the money he was delighted. He wrote the following ‘Thank you’ letter to the CM:

Dear God, I thank you for sending me money through the Chief Minister’s Office Secretariat in Chennai. However, I would like you to know that corrupt asses there must have swindled 70 rupees as their commission! “



Images of floods in Chennai in November 2015 (



Chennai floods and the aftermath (

Do You Have Tight Nuts or a Rusty Tool?


By T.V. Antony Raj



An old ad for wd-40


The above leaflet from the 1960’s  created by a master craftsman is a gross and most brazen advertisement loaded with double entendre for WD-40. It is an innuendo that seems to work with the true facts of what WD-40 can do. Even though the ad is a fake, it gives the impression of a real advert from the 1960’s with the stains and frayed edges.

On November 4, 2014,  a user posted this image showing a printed advertisement for the WD-40 spray lubricant  in a “funny photos” thread on the US Message Board, asserting it was an ad from 1960. As the image got shared on sites such as  Facebook, Imgur, and Reddit, the date changed,  with the most common claim being 1964.

Several attributes of the advertisement give it away as a fake:

1. If this was a genuine, high-profile ad for WD-40 why is it the only photograph available on the Internet documenting its existence?

2. If you look at this image critically you will note that it is not a photograph at all. The  paper on which the advertisement appears looks old and crinkled, but the letters are straight. This implies that the text is  a digital overlay on a background image of a crinkled page.

3. The image describes the product as “WD 40” when its name is, and always had been, rendered as WD-40.

4. The image refers to a ‘red knob‘ whereas the distinctive red cap that now tops the WD-40 cans was originally black!

By the way, those of you not familiar with WD-40 must be wondering what the hell it is.

Back in 1953, Norm Larsen founded the Rocket Chemical Company. The fledgling company and its staff of three set out to create a line of rust-prevention solvents and degreasers for use in the aerospace industry.

Working in a small lab in San Diego, California, Norm Larsen, a persistent chemist, perfected his water displacing formula on his 40th try. So, WD-40 stands for “Water Displacement, the 40th formula“, a name that came straight out of the lab book used by Norm Larsen.

The formula of WD-40 is a trade secret. Out of fear of disclosing its composition Norm Larsen did not apply for a patent for WD-40 in 1953. The opportunity for patenting the product has long since elapsed since the application for a patent should have been filed prior to any public use or public disclosure of the invention anywhere in the world. Even today, the original secret formula for WD-40 is still in use.

The Convair Division of General Dynamics at the Kearny Mesa assembly plant north of San Diego, California, built the SM-65 Atlas, for U.S. Air Force. It was the first intercontinental ballistic missile (ICBM) developed and deployed by the United States that became operational in October 1959. The Atlas missile’s warhead was over 100 times more powerful than the bomb dropped over Nagasaki in 1945.

Later on, for almost half a century, the Atlas missile served as a first stage satellite launch vehicle.

The balloon-like paper-thin stainless steel fuel tanks of the Atlas missile were and fragile, and when empty, to prevent them from collapsing, they had to be kept inflated with nitrogen.

Convair used WD-40 as a corrosion-inhibiting coating to protect the paper-thin stainless steel outer skin of the fuel tanks of the Atlas missile from rust and corrosion.


WD-40 worked well to inhibit rust and corrosion. This prompted several employees to sneak out some WD-40 cans out of the plant to use in their homes.

A few years following WD-40’s first industrial use, Norm Larsen reasoned that consumers might find a use for the product in their homes as some of the employees had. So, in 1958, he put the product into aerosol cans and made it available in stores in San Diego.

In 1960, Norm Larsen’s Rocket Chemical Company doubled in size, growing to seven people and sold an average of 45 cases per day to hardware and sporting goods stores in the San Diego area.

On Monday, September 11, 1961, Hurricane Carla, ranked as the most intense US tropical cyclone with a highest wind speed of 280 km/h made landfall near Port O’Connor, Texas.

To meet the disaster needs of the victims of Hurricane Carla along the US Gulf coast, the Rocket Chemical Company filled its first full truckload order for WD-40 to use in reconditioning flood and rain damaged vehicles and equipment.

In 1968, soldiers in Vietnam received goodwill kits containing WD-40 to help keep their firearms in superb working condition by preventing damage from moisture.

In 1969, the company changed its name to WD-40 Company, Inc., after its only product.

In 1973, the company went public. On the first day of listing, the stock price increased by 61%. From then on, the WD-40 Company, Inc., grew by leaps and bounds. In 1993, WD-40 sales grew to more than one million cans per week.

WD-40 is now virtually a household name in America with 80% American households using it. About 81 percent of professionals in many consumer and industrial markets such as aviation, automotive, manufacturing, construction, hardware, home improvement, farming, and sporting goods, use it regularly.

WD-40’s main ingredients as supplied in aerosol cans, according to U.S. Material Safety Data Sheet information are:

(1) Aliphatic hydrocarbons – 50%”.
According to the manufacturer’s website this ratio in the current formulation per se is not Stoddard solvent which is a similar mixture of hydrocarbons.

(2) Petroleum base oil – 25%.
Probably a mineral oil or light lubricating oil.

(3) Low vapor pressure aliphatic hydrocarbon – 12 to 18%.
To reduce the liquid’s viscosity for use in aerosols. The hydrocarbon evaporates during application.

(4) Carbon dioxide – 2 to 3%.
A propellant used instead of the original liquefied petroleum gas to reduce WD-40’s flammability.

(5) Inert ingredients – 10%.




Two Cows in Political Isms …


By T.V. Antony Raj


In the ancient days to convey their viewpoint across to their listeners orators used metaphors, similes, and analogies. Now, to explain complex ideas we use simple and humorous images and share them using the internet.

Yo have two coves

The various anecdotes that start with the saying “You have two cows …” refer to a form of political satire. They involve variations of a scenario, where eponymous cows are used to demonstrate the functioning of some political systems.

A column titled “The Class in Political Isms” in The Chicago Daily Tribune of December 3, 1938, attributes a version involving socialism, communism, fascism and New Dealism to an address by Silas Strawn to the Economic Club of Chicago on November 29, 1935.

A Canadian writer and journalist Bill Sherk mentions that such satirical snippets circulated throughout the United States since around 1936 under the title “Parable of the Isms”.

In the collection of humour in “Vox Lycei 1939-1940” compiled by the Lisgar Alumni Association the following snippet appears on page 71 :


Socialism: You have two cows. You give one to your neighbour.

Communism: You have two cows. You give both cows to the Government which lets you buy part of it back.

American New Deal: You have two cows. The Government shoots one cow, buys the milk from the other cow and pours it down the sewer.

Nazism: You have two cows. The Government shoots you and takes the cows and sells the milk.

Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

Social Credit: You ‘shoot the bull’.

As early as 1944, the humour of this type attracted the attention of scholars in the United States. An article in The Modern Language Journal lists the following classical ones some of which are similar to those in “Vox Lycei 1939-1940” :


Socialism: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbour.


Communism: You have two cows. You give them to the government, and the government then gives you some milk.


Fascism: You have two cows. You give them to the government, and the government then sells you some milk.

Traditional Capitalism

Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

In the late 1960s, comedian Pat Paulsen on The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour appended this comment to capitalism: “…Then put both of them in your wife’s name and declare bankruptcy.”  Later on, he used this material as an element of his satirical US presidential campaign in 1968 and was included it on his 1968 comedy album “Pat Paulsen for President“.


Nazism: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.

To these, we can add Bureaucratism:



And also:
Venture capitalism





This is How Babies are Born!


By T.V. Antony Raj


Bill Cosby and Raven -Symoné
Bill Cosby and Raven -Symoné


Grownups can sometimes be so thick, it is not easy to explain some facts to them.

In this video, this little girl Olivia Kendall (played by Raven-Symoné) is having a hard time trying to explain to the doctor for women (Bill Cosby) how babies are born.



This is How Babies are Born!


Doctor:  And this is my office

Olivia:  What do you do?

Doctor:  I am a doctor for women.

Olivia:  What do you do with them?

Doctor:  I deliver their babies.

Olivia:  Deliver?

Doctor:  When the woman has the baby inside of her, then I go in and I take it out.

Olivia:  No you don’t. Everybody knows that the stork brings the baby.

Doctor:  Who, who told you that?

Olivia:  My daddy.

Doctor:  Okay. Well, the stork puts the baby inside of the mother… and then I go in and I take it out.

Olivia:  Ah, aah. The stork brings the baby to the hospital, drops it in the bassinet.

Doctor:  So you’re saying that the baby is not inside the mummy? Then why is it that the mother gets real big?

Olivia:  Because she eats a lot of food.

Doctor:  Now let me get this straight. You say that the stork carries over, puts the baby in the bassinet, and the mother is real big because she eats a lot of food?

Olivia:  You got it!

Doctor:  I see. Well, then why is it that the mother has to go to the hospital?

Olivia:  The stork brings the baby to the hospital, drops it in the bassinet. The mummy goes to the hospital and gets it.

Doctor:  If the stork does all that, why doesn’t the stork just bring it to the mummy’s house?

Olivia:  Because it’s too far. His wings will get tired.

Doctor:  Where does the stork get the babies from?

Olivia:  Heaven.

Doctor:  Okay. There is a zillion skillion babies in Heaven. How does the stork know what baby goes with what mother?

Olivia:  They are in a line. You know, like you go to the baker and get a number.

Doctor:  Why when I put my hand on the mother I can feel things moving all around?

Olivia:  That’s not a baby.

Doctor:  What is it?

Olivia:  Gas.

Doctor:  Well, thank you for explaining it to me.

Olivia:  You’re welcome, but you still didn’t tell me what you do.

Doctor:  I’m in charge of gas.


William Henry “Bill” Cosby Jr. (born July 12, 1937) is an American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and activist. Cosby’s start in stand-up comedy began at the hungry i, originally a nightclub in North Beach, San Francisco. It was followed by a starring role in the 1960s television show I Spy. Beginning in the 1980s, Cosby produced and starred in The Cosby Show, a television sitcom, which aired from 1984 to 1992. It was rated as the number one show in America for five years, 1984 through 1989. The sitcom highlighted the experiences and growth of an affluent African-American family.

Raven-Symoné Christina Pearman (born December 10, 1985) is an American actress, comedian, model, singer, songwriter, dancer, television producer and a talk-show host. She first appeared on television in 1989 on The Cosby Show as Olivia Kendall.





Tit for Tat


By T.V. Antony Raj..



“Tit for tat” is an English saying dating to 1556, from “tip for tap”, i.e., retaliation in kind, an action given in return.

Here is an example. If you knock your sister in the head and she knocks you back, that’s tit for tat.

Tit for tat is like “blow for a blow.”

If you offer someone a chocolate  and she gives you one back, that’s not tit for tat, that’s  just offering a sweet.

On the other hand, “tit for tat” is meaner. It is something like when you hit someone and the other person retaliates with something equally bad.

This phrase is like saying “Let the punishment fit the crime!

That’s what you see in this video.

But what a punishment! I’d love that! :)




I Got Out Early…


By T.V. Antony Raj

Source: Deccan Chronicle - Counter Point  March 27, 2015
Source: Deccan Chronicle – Counter Point March 27, 2015


The following news appeared in the Deccan Chronicles on August 22, 2014. I wonder whether it has some relevance now.  You be the judge.

Restriction on wives, girlfriends for Indian players during tours?

DC | August 22, 2014

Mumbai: The Indian cricket board on Thursday denied the reports that they had restricted the WAGs (wives and girlfriends) of Indian cricketer during the away tours, according to reports.

The Board of Control for Cricket in India were contemplating to ban the players’ partners during the foreign tours. The rationale was that the Indian cricketers’ performance was getting affected by the presence of WAGs.

While the BCCI had allowed the wives of Ashwin, Vijay, Pujara, Binny and Gambhir to travel with them, the Indian cricket board had approved Virat Kohli’s request to allow Anushka Sharma to travel with him, reports.



Jugaad Innovations


By T.V. Antony Raj


Jugad Innovation (Custom)


Jugaad is a colloquial Hindi-Urdu word that can mean an innovative fix or a simple workaround, used for solutions that bend rules, or a resource that can be used as such. Jugaad can also denote a person who can solve a complicated issue.

Here is a video of Jugaad technology put to use mainly in India and in a few other countries. I am proud to say that the majority of Indians can boast of such innovations.



Weird Isn’t It?

Myself  .By T.V. Antony Raj



The above video posted by Jordan on YouTube has evoked a variety of hilarious comments from the viewers. Here are some:

Eloisa Costal Bonadio: “What is it?!? English please!!

Athis Coquillon: “Chinese Instant roman noodles.”

Malcom Rosenthal: “Whatever it is, keep that over there.

Darren Zachary Munoz: “What everyone wishes their marijuana could do.”

Jason P Conyers: “Whatever that is, pour gasoline in with it, lite it up and walk away from it.” (sic)

Chantelle Leanne Bruce: “This incredible desert plant often is referred to as rose of Jericho. In its dried state, it is already a great decoration of desert type terrariums …”

Lisa Cagle: “It’s a rubber band ball.”

Fatima Sano: “How is that a rubber band ball that is able to regrow and regurgitate itself and that is hard as tree bark… Please stop I don’t think so! that was nasty and I still got the hibby gibbies from watching that #Yuck” (sic)

Brandon Bullock: “Whatever it is, I’m sure someone will blame Obama.”

 Lisa Cagle guess is correct. It is a rubber band ball.

Jordan built this elastic band ball together with his father. They bought bags of elastic bands and added them onto the ball for a year. As the ball grew, they found it quite difficult to find elastic bands, that could still make it all the way round. After a year, they got bored and stopped growing the ball. They left it under a table for another year. After a while, the elastic on the outer layers frayed and started snapping. Every day they found snapped elastic bands on the floor. Then, they decided to get rid of it.

Jordan suggested cutting the rubber band ball in half. He started sawing the ball. After about 10-15 minutes, weird stuff started happening. Jordan decided to film it. He handed the saw to his father and got his camera and filmed the bizarre.

At the time I saw this video it had been viewed 6,329,151 times.

Rubber band balls are a lot of fun to make, and the record for the largest one ever made used 700,000 elastic bands and weighed 4,097 kilograms (9,032 lb).

Wish You All a Merry Christmas!

Myself  .By T.V. Antony Raj


IMG_0197 (Small)


These cute Tiny Tot Santas are Standard I students of Vidya Matric. Hr. Sec. School, Jalladianppet, Chennai, India where my elder daughter Sujata now teaches.

These little Santas danced to Christmas Jingles during the Chrismas Day celebrations at their school on December 19, 2014.

They captivated the hearts of everyone with their hilarious performance!

How to Make a Yellow Submarine Sandwich!

Myself  .By T.V. Antony Raj


In this stop-motion animated video titled “Submarine Sandwich” PES shows us in a witty, funny way how to make a Yellow Submarine Sandwich!